Abandon Family

Question:

Ven. Master,

I am a Buddhist disciple. I have never heard any left home person teach people to abandon their family, their husband and children to leave the home life. Do you feel that your teaching is appropriate? I asked a lot of monks and nuns. Which sutra do you base such teaching?
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TH

Answer:

Had you broadened your research a little more to other religions, you would have found that, for example, the Catholics have married women and mothers amongst their nuns. I do not believe that their scriptures forbid married people from becoming monastics.

Similarly, there are no Buddhist scriptures that forbid married women from becoming nuns. For example, the Buddha’s wife and even his aunt later became nuns while his father was still alive.

If you turn the matter around, perhaps it is because religions do not discriminate against married people.

Furthermore, had you talked to more left home people, you would have found out that a lot of married people did leave the home life in the history of Buddhism.

I apologize if this offends you personally because you seem to be.

May I suggest that if you look at the Buddhist teaching: “If there is gathering then there is separation”? Is there any party or celebration that does not come to an end?

If you had listened to my other lectures, you might have run into more information on the topic.

Fundamentally, one stays married because of conditions. Similarly, one gets divorced because of conditions. One also leaves the home life because of conditions. The overwhelming majority of married women who would like to become nuns cannot leave the home life because conditions do not permit.

Personally, I believe in the individual choice to live life as one feels that it has meaning. I allow people to leave the home life but do not allow them to abandon their responsibility.
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Please feel free to express your opinions because something tells me that you are convinced otherwise.